Relax, Anna!

I can't wait to go home. The weather here is unbearable, for me at least, getting to at least 30 each day. Not my kind of weather. Give me cold shade any day. The people here are annoying too and the room is always hot despite the open window and fan. I complain a lot but I have been enjoying my outings, even though it takes a huge effort to get anywhere. I posted some of my heavier books back today -- from me to me! I got two maxi dresses and I doubt they'll weigh much but I think I was pretty spot on on the way up so I don't want to push my luck. I've spent too much money already. I don't want to spend anymore, but since I won't be earning anything my savings will go down! No! I'm not sure when Centrelink will kick in but I will go in there when I can and drop off some forms, maybe even tomorrow afternoon. Sarah and I might go for breakfast. Then I can quickly print off some documents ... actually no. I don't have my last 8 weeks of pay slips with me. Another day.

I had a late lunch with Joyce today and it was nice but she made me feel crap about myself, unintentionally but hurtful nonetheless, because I'm shy and timid and "didn't give Sydney a chance." I know that I'm shy and timid but I want to feel comfortable, not like I'm jumping in the deep end just because I'm shy and timid. I want my friends around. I want to continue having fun in this time of my life, what with being single and myself for the first time ever, and I know I'll have that in Melbourne. It's cheaper, it's cooler [weather-wise], it's closer to home, it still has the course I want to do, it is an adventure, and it'll be a surprise. I might not have given Sydney a real go but why waste time when I know how it'll go, kind of. I'll waste money and time and energy because it's so damned hot and the houses are way too expensive. I don't want to live with randoms but living alone here would cost way too much. I want to keep on loving this city, not resent it.

I am really looking forward to starting my course. And on a new campus too! I started reading some of the books they sent me in the mail last night while trying to get to sleep and I think it's going to be interesting. I bought some note books from Typo to use for first semester so I'm looking forward to getting stuck into that. I just feel stressed thinking about it. I won't have a house to go to straight away unless I can live with Nicole and Rom [Sarah's room mates] and their friend. Holly and Ruben will do the couples thing and Amy and Carly are set I think. Scary. Got to chill.

I'm going to see Tangled tonight. I saw The King's Speech last night and quite enjoyed it. I am a bit worried about the money I'm spending but I have a fair bit stored away and I will most likely be getting Centrelink. I feel like my life is a waste but I just have to do the things I want to do and not get too stressed about it all. That's what this year will teach me I think. The Year of the Rabbit.