I am very glad to be back from Launceston and feeling nice and clean. I love my shower the best. I did enjoy staying an extra night though and I might make that a habit. It's going to get darker a lot quicker than I'm used to when driving back to Hobart from Launceston. I don't want to have an accident on that road. It's notorious for accidents. I also hate driving at night because of the lights coming straight at me. They are too bright. If it weren't for that, I would love driving at night, and I do. We watched some good TV and I saw her on the news for WIN Television. It was good! I need to try and watch her more. Maybe if/when Yorick and I get a new house I can get my own set top box and have it set up permanently so it'll be easy to watch the news. Sometimes it's set on his Playstation but I don't think it is now. Maybe I'll try watch it tonight.
After I left Zum on Monday afternoon where I had a hot chocolate and got a muffin for my morning tea the next day, Yorick and I didn't have a nice farewell and I wrote myself a note when I got to Launceston saying I felt like I was on probation and didn't want to be sad soon but that it might happen soon. I accidentally sent that to him and he asked if it was about that afternoon. I just said I was writing to myself and how I felt a little strange about our goodbye. I'm home now and so is he. He's still in bed sleeping so I guess we'll talk later. I hope he'll actually have dinner with me tonight. Oh I wish. Hopefully we can talk about what we're going to do and how I feel like if we live together we'll stay in these bad habits. I'm scared about that. We'll just have to discuss it.
Sophie said he sent her a message the other day and I got her to send it to me. It gives me hope:
Yeah I'm ok considering. See how things pan out. Look after her tomorrow night.
It's really sweet of him to ask her to look after me. And she did. We had a big chat about it and it's done me the world of good. He still cares about me. I'm just not sure what he wants, really. I still feel like he's trying to save me from pain. That's not helpful. This messages makes me think he's really going to try though. Not super hard but he'll try. That's all I'm asking for. Maybe we can look for a new house this weekend or something. We need new elements of togetherness in our lives together, like kicking the soccer ball around on the oval and sitting down for dinner. Last night in bed I thought that we could have 2 nights a week [Wednesday or Thursday depending on Margate dinner and Sunday] together where we have dinner and hang out. That would be a start. We can also do the soccer thing and just catch up. I'd like it if we got a new house, bigger, and had separate rooms. I'll ask him later.
Today I just want to watch One Tree Hill but I have some washing to do and some flute practice. I also need to heat up a bit. It's a cold one today.
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