That boy

Glenn is just amazing. We were talking on the phone last night after I finished work but it was hard to hear him at times because of the reception in South Hobart, so we went onto Google+ and did a Hangout. It was so lovely to see him. It's always better than talking on the phone but of course it's not always possible. We had the best talk. At one stage I said that we've pretty much decided that I'm to move home, which is something I'm happy to do, not only for us but for other reasons such as family, friends, and my career. I said that's all good as long as he doesn't change his mind. To that he said he'll wait for me! That's the most romantic thing ever. I love that. We talked a little about how things will change, but it'll be for the best. We've only spent 9 days together in the last 1.5 months so we're looking forward to spending a lot more time together. He said he'll date the shit out of me. He he he. He said he likes that he's not feeling any pressure from me and it's the same for me from him. We're relaxed. I can't wait until next weekend when he's here for 5 days from noon on the Thursday to around the same time on the Wednesday. We already have some things planned but I'm stressing a little about what shifts I'll have at Veludo. I haven't been getting many lately, and next weekend that suits me more than ever, although I do need the money, more stress right there. Earlier yesterday things were making me feel completely stressed and all I wanted to do was to be with Glenn, but it's not possible right now. I seriously can't wait until he's here. Then he's away until the 1st of October factoring in time zones for him coming back from Europe. We'll have another 5 days together then too. Then I'll be down in Hobart from the 24th of October to the 3rd of November! 10-11 days. I can't wait! God I miss him. I miss being able to hug him and kiss him and do the soft scratchy back massage thing with him. I miss getting to know him more, although we're doing a pretty good job now. We talked everyday, if only via text, but we talk every day or two and do maybe one Google+ Hangout a week. We're doing well. I love that he's going to wait for me. He just wants me to put myself first. I don't exactly want to move back to the city of Hobart as I'd much rather be in Melbourne itself, but I'm doing this for us. As long as I can get a job I'll be set. Then we will find out how far we will go. I want my own house, to do up just how I like it. I want masons jars for drinking out of. I want to frame and have my posters up. I want the awesome wooden closet I got from Mt Nelson and place for my gym equipment. I want him to come over all the time and for me to go to his place. I want him to date the shit out of me! I can't wait. We send each other pictures of ourselves, by the way. I have some lovely ones from him. He actually owes me some. Not long now until he's here. On the Thursday we'll check into the George Powlett Motel in East Melbourne then as long as I'm not working, or if god forbid I am I can get rid of it, then we'll go to Bimbos for dinner and see Tiger Funk again, the band that was on the time he, Nicole and I went. We're also going to have lots of warm cider, and have either a double or triple date with his friends and Amy and Gav, if they're all free and up for it, we're going to stay in bed for a whole day, we're going to go see the Tutankahmun exhibition at the Melbourne Museum, we'll get me some poi and practice in the park, go to the Fitzroy Gardens, go to Illy, see the Illusionist at the Nova Cinemas, go to ACMI, and some anime shops. We have lots to do. I believe I'll be working at some stage over the weekend. I'm still praying I didn't get many shifts. I'll have Uni on the Friday. I should have the Monday to Wednesday completely free. It's going to be so amazing having him here. We think the Motel might be pretty basic but it'll be ours. It has a queen bed I think, a little kitchenette and our own bathroom! That was one of my requests. I'm so excited. It'll be great. He's also going to do some time lapses that I'll tag along to. I hope I don't have to work much. That's one of my biggest fears for next week. I'll find out tomorrow morning. Seekae tonight! Then Husky tomorrow night. Lots of homework to be done. I really need to do some now. I'll get onto that.

I'm back!

I am so bad. I haven't written in months. It's not that I didn't want to. First it was the fact that I didn't have regular internet access. Then I got used to not writing, but now some major developments have arisen that I want to document. I'm just lazy but I want this hiatus to be over.

Working at Velduo is going good as usual. I can't wait until I have a 'real' job though in cultural heritage. That'll be amazing. I have been working occasionally at Watermark as well and that's fine too. More cruisy, which I like. It's comparable to working at Relish, as Veludo is to thebeach. I like that I'm getting cash in hand so I can get Centrelink as well. I'm naughty but everyone does it.

Uni is going well. There have been so so so many assignments to do. My assignment schedule is insane. Seriously I hate it. I'm in the second 'trimester' now, currently in the middle of World Heritage. I have already finished the on-campus classes for Collections and Movable Cultural Heritage and handed in the first assignment for that yesterday. I'm still finishing off assignments for Cultural Landscapes. The last one was due yesterday but I had to get an extension because the case study I chose was too hard. I'm focusing on Sullivan's Cove now and its management issues. Once I find those I will feel like I'm in a better position. At the moment I'm a bit stressed about it because I don't have much to write about. Drat those management issues!! Where are you? My last assignment is due on the day after my birthday, but I'm planning to get that done earlier. I don't want it to ruin my birthday! Then all I'll have is the field placement unit and I'll be set! I'm planning to do that back home. My plans have certainly changed, and all because of the results of one night.

On Thursday the 14th of July, Nicole, Glenn and I hung out. We had ciders at the Young and Jackson's rooftop cider bar near Flinder's Street Station then went to Bimbos for $4 pizzas. It was a lot of fun. Nicole and Glenn had worked together at Wrest Point and I knew him through Yorick, through Apples, through Helen. He had contacted me a few months earlier saying that we should catch up while he was in Melbourne and we did. At Bimbos, Glenn sent me a text message while sitting next to me. He was going to say something, and I bugged it out of him. He said he wasn't sure if he should say it. The text said that he thought we flirted well. We all decided to go and see Harry Potter 7 Part 2 at the movies and he had his arm on the arm rest and I took it. We ended up kissing. They were the best kisses ever. We all caught a cab back to the YHA, then Glenn went back to his hotel. We met up the next day. I tried to get out of working at Watermark but I couldn't, but we met up between my shift there and the one at Veludo. I met him at the Flinder's steps. We caught the free tram to Spencer Street then caught the 96 to St Kilda and sat on the beach. He was carrying all his luggage with him. We talked and laughed. On the free tram he couldn't believe it when I said I was 24. On the 96 we were facing each other on different sides of the tram and had our legs connecting. Once we were walking on the beach, I got him to stop and we kissed. Then we sat down on the beach and talked. We walked up to Veludo and stood outside and kissed and hugged, and he held his arms up a few times to make us stop touching, probably because it was getting a bit heated. He he he. Then I went to work. We met up a week later when I went back to Tassie for Etta's first birthday [July 24th]. We met outside the Maritime after I had finished talking to Rona about an assignment. He had shaved his mountain man beard. We walked around Battery Point and talked and talked. Then we sat on a bench near the back of TMAG near the courtyard before he went off and I had dinner at Cool Thai and $10 cosmopolitans with Emma, Sarah, and Holly. After that, Sarah and I went back to hers. Glenn picked me up from there. We went back to his place and hung out in his room. I had a look at his DVD collection and pointed out all the ones I liked. He groaned because we have a lot of things in common. I got lost on the way back to his bedroom from the bathroom. I stood still. He found me and didn't laugh as such but said I'll be alright in a cute I like you way. We undressed each other, although he went to the bathroom and came back in only his red shorts/pants/undies. The sex was amazing, seriously the best ever. It was so nice sleeping next to him. We did it again in the morning, had an amazing shower together, and went out for breakfast down the road. We hung out at his place for the rest of the day until I went home for dinner. On Saturday we hung out again and I stayed over. I can't remember what we did. On Sunday morning we had a spa together. It was awesome. Then I went home quickly before heading over to James and George's for Etta's birthday party. Super cute. Then I hung out with Sophie at thebeach, then Monika, then home for tea before heading back up to see Glenn. That morning I had gotten a bit sad. I also got sad before I left. Backtracking a bit, we had been texting all week and kinda built up the sex, or unwrapping me, because I was his late birthday present and him my early present. He he. Amazing. So we hung out for an hour and a bit before he went to cricket and I headed to James and George's so James could take me out to the airport. Glenn said to me to tell him if things get too hard to tell him, to promise. I did. I was sad to go. After that we texted and talked on the phone and I planned another trip down in two weeks, just to see him. I felt helpless before that trip was booked. I just came back from this second trip three days ago. I went down on Monday morning. Sarah picked me up and I hung at her place until Glenn got me at 4. We went to his place then picked up James and headed to his place to see Etta and G and have pizza! Sarah joined us. Glenn likes my family. They liked him too. Then we went to his house. We were going to see a movie but I was super tired so we hung out in his room instead. It was awesome. More great sex. We put onSource Code to watch but we saw none of it. None of the entire thing... He he he. On Tuesday he went to work. I studied in his bed. Then I met mum for some Spotlight shopping, then met Glenn after that. We went to the Post Office briefly then walked to my car near Sarah's in West Hobart then went to his place. We watched some anime then had a date at Mee Wah. So fancy! He has an alergy to seafood but he didn't get sick. Then we saw Hanna at the State. It was awesome. We were going to get Cold Rock but it was closed by the time the movie got out. Sad. Then we went back to his place and I stroked his back with soft fingers for ages. He said it was the best night ever and that he had never felt so relaxed before. It was bliss. On Wednesday morning we got up at 930. He was meant to go back to the Post Office and get his passport photos done, then see the passport people, but had to change plans. We had a shower together, he shaved then got back in. We went to the Post Office and were talking about heavy stuff and I got a bit upset. I had promised myself that if I came on that trip I wouldn't cry, because otherwise I wouldn't have seen him for a whole month instead of having a two week break in between. He wanted me to look at him when I started getting emotional but I didn't want to. I had to go outside and have a breather and get myself under control. He said he has the same feelings as me but I'm more open about it. I cry too easily. It's true. Then we walked down to Salamanca, I took a photo of the Tasmanian Mission to Seafarers, who knew right!?, then we went to the Vietnamese Kitchen for 'breakfast' and had more deeper conversations. Then we went to Margate for an hour for lunch, a play with Etta, then he took me to the airport. He dropped me off and he left reasonably quickly. I thought he was going to come in but it turned out that I didn't have to wait long. I missed him already and still do. The flight went by with my nodding off and doing that head jerk thing. Slightly embarrassing! I got back to Melbourne and he sent me a text, and he said he was glad I was safe. We've talked on the phone most days since, not that many but still. We're going to do a Google+ Hangout tomorrow. He's coming over at the start of September before he heads to Europe until the end of September. Then he'll be back with me. We'll hang for around 5 days either side of his trip. We'd better have a house by then! Then I'm going back home from the 24th of October to the 3rd of November to be with him and to celebrate turning 25. Woah. Hopefully I can do another 10 days in November. I want to go back to Hobart to be with him. He's concerned because he doesn't want me to give anything up to be with him. I'm not 100% sure about it but I want to be with him full-time and I think we have potential. He likes the idea but yes, he trusts me, but is concerned. Sweet. I have my own concerns but I'll only do it if I'm sure. I'll have Etta and my family there, a job in cultural heritage, I'll get my own place, go to the gym, experience more of Hobart by Glenn's side, know how far we can go, and if it doesn't turn out how I hope, then I can go off and travel the world as originally planned. I want to do that anyway while I'm back there, if I move back. Time will tell. We're not deciding anything yet. I just want to be with him. We talked for quite a while this afternoon. For the whole tram ride back from St Kilda and even more while I walked to the YHA and I even sat outside for a bit. He clarified that he sending me that text in Bimbos was his green light. I wasn't sure if grabbing his hand wasn't what he wanted, because he's a bit sarcastic and when we were talking in the Vietnamese Kitchen he made it sound like it was my fault, but that was just Glenn being Glenn. We're in a relationship now, he said. I don't regret it. He said when I was back and we were walking that he only regrets us because of how it could end, not because we would fall out of love or one of us cheated on the other, but because we wouldn't be able to see each other enough. How sad. It's a funny situation but I wouldn't take it back. Never. Ever. His sister Laura likes me already and has been in contact with me on Facebook. She's never done this with any of his ex's. I like that. I'll meet them all in October when I'm down. He he. I really like this one. I think he's great. He's mature. He's 28. He used to be in the circus. He's still performing a bit but he busted his shoulder so that ruined things a bit. He has great hair. He's taller than me but still short. He's beautiful. He things I'm beautiful. He makes me laugh. We're cruisy when we're together and we both love that. No stress. We both hate that we have had to have all these intense talks because of the distance but he doesn't mind. He's charming, but he said he's argumentative. He's a Taurus. He smells great. He likes my bum. I think it's too big. I just love being with him. I miss him and I want to be in the same place as he is. Sigh. I think we could go pretty far. He was shocked when I told him Y and I had been together for 4 years. His longest relationship was 2.5 years. I've been with more people than he has and earlier. I've done drugs. He hasn't. I'm so naughty compared to him. He is a bit funny about the age gap. I'm not. He doesn't care too much about if we do or don't have sex. That suits me fine. It used to be a chore but not now. I miss his hugs and kisses. Oh that boy. We're part-time. I don't like that but it's better than nothing. I'm surprised I slotted back into my life here so easily. I cried a little that night, only because I was exhausted, but fine after that. I just wish I were there experiencing life alongside him. I still have him, just not physically. I can't wait until we get time together again. If Nicole, Amy and her partner Gav/Gavin, aren't in a house before the start of September, we'll stay in a room together somewhere, maybe at the YHA, or somewhere else, but it'd be so nice to have him in my own room, to celebrate getting one. We're so compatible. I love it. We are alike in many ways. Or have the same interests. He said he'd been looking for someone who likes anime as much as he did for most of his life. That's me. We're dating. We're in a relationship. He is friends with all his ex's. I like that idea. I'm not with mine. I like him a lot. So much.

So that's enough for now.

Nicole, Amy and Gavin and I are all looking for a 3 bedroom house together. Hopefully we have somewhere before September, as was the aim, but perhaps not. By September for sure. They're fairly desperate. I've been here for 5.5 months. Things haven't gone as planned but that's okay. I've learned a lot and I am grateful I'm here.

Now it's time for a quick chat to my parents to find out what they think of Glenn and then homework! Sigh.

Kirsten's birthday

Today is Kirsten's birthday! We had cake for breakfast. I had cereal either side of that so I don't feel so bad. The cake was alright. I don't have anywhere in particular to be today so I'm struggling a bit with what to do. I need to go to Centrelink and I need to call the Deakin bookshop because I'm missing one set of readers, which I didn't realise. I had listed all my units as online so they sent me the books, but I changed them to on campus study. I changed one back when I saw that there were the readers but not the other as the bookshop didn't mention anything about readers. I looked online last night and they don't have the ones I need in stock so I'll call them soon and ask if there are any anywhere. There is an online copy but I prefer having the physical book. So there's that! I will also vacuum this place for Kirsten before the birthday party tonight [combined] and I need to get in contact with George's cousin about having a meet up just for fun. There are some other little things I can't think of.

Yesterday I had my first day of volunteering at the Mission to Seafarers. It's so cruisy there. Monica taught me how to catalogue photographs so I did that for most of the day. The photographs were of the stained-glass windows in the Saint Peter the Mariner's Chapel and I found it hard to describe the and use religious or olden-day terms. I'm not so good at that. She got me to bring my laptop to do some scanning on but I didn't bring the CD drive thinking I wouldn't need it so I didn't actually use it. It was a bit of a waste to lug it around there and back. We finished at around 3pm and I went and met Nicole, Sarah's now ex flatmate from Tassie. We had a drink [hot chocolate for me, iced mocha for her] and a chat. Then I did some shopping and came back here. I did some more study, found lots of useful things on the Deakin website about unit resources and unit guides. Now I just have to find out about that last reader. It's for Monday so that's a bit annoying. Arrg.

Tomorrow I have that trial at Kamel. I'm not looking forward to it only because I'm used to not working anymore and I love it! I want to keep not working and just get Centrelink. I wonder if with all the study I'm sure I'll be doing if I'll have time for a job. I'll have one, hopefully two days of volunteering work, and that leaves three days. I might have to work on a few of them but I'll need one day free for sanity and for studying but I'm sure I'll always have to study. I take a long time to read one chapter so having lots of breaks in between works the best for me. Drat it.

I had a lovely chat to mum, Sarah, James, dad and George last night in that order. It was strange being on the other side as we usually call people who are far away and now that's me. It's strange not being there for the dinner I miss that. I didn't even know about it and that makes me a little sad. Now I get what Sarah meant about being out of the loop. It was so easy living there knowing everything that was going on. Thinking about it makes me a little sad now! And feeling crap about this trial is getting me down more. It would be nice to disapparate there Harry Potter style for lunch or something lovely. If only. I was thinking of going back for Easter but I had a look at flights for the 21st to the 25th or something and it'll be $300! That's not cool. I'll check for cheaper ones. I might have a week off Uni at some stage but I'm not quite sure yet. I might go then. Who knows.

It feels so natural and relaxed being in Melbourne and yet so much, or not so much, is still happening back home. It's strange to be missing out on that. It makes me sad that I'm missing out on seeing Etta grow up more and more. I'll be back to visit eventually and not let her go. Hehe.

I really want to get started on my running training. Once I'm settled in a house I'll have to start my 6-12 week program. Kirsten mentioned the half-marathon. She's going to enter and Sandi, one of her housemates, is also going to enter and yet she hasn't trained much. It's not until October so hopefully Sandi and I will be ready by then. Plenty of time. I really hope I get the Hawthorn house. Please! I doubt it but please!

What else is news? Not much. I can't wait to start Uni on Monday but first I have to get over the hurdle of this darn trial at Kamel. I might really like it and might even get a bit of cash for it which would be awesome. I'll just have to endure it. It won't last forever. It's a shame it's so far away though. I could do Friday and Saturday day shifts there for a while. I want to keep Sundays free. I hate working on Sundays.

I went into the Telstra shop yesterday and upgraded my internet from 500mb to 1g. I can't wait for it to kick in. I didn't even have to pay! I'm so excited about that. All I need now is a new computer with internet that works. Something lighter and smaller maybe. I'm not sure if I should get one of the mini laptops or just a normal sized one. Depends if it's really light or not. I like the idea of taking a small one traveling for the internet and storing photos. One day I might have both.

I will call the Uni bookshop and see what they say about the books.

Stream of consciousness

I haven't been updating as I normally do since writing in Twitter. Because I've written what I'm thinking/obsessing about in some form, I forget to do it in this form. Sarah and I saw No Strings Attached at the movies on Wednesday night. We had popcorn and frozen cokes and I had a vanilla ice cream. We were so stuffed. I had already had a lovely dinner out on the deck with mum and dad. They had bbq meat and I had bbq'd salmon and we had a nice salad. It was a nice, warm day on Wednesday. On Monday we did the same, having lunch out on the deck. It's these things that I forget to write. It was nice hanging out with them. I have also been re-reading Twilight and I love it. I want someone to ask me a million questions about myself and for me to do the same with them. That's what I love about their relationship. Amongst other things of course. I wish I could be in their world, or at least replaying it all over in my mind the way I see it, and the way it was written down. The movie has its good parts, like showing me how they run really fast and those types of scenes, but the little things aren't in there and that's a shame. I like the movie and the book in my head better. Today and yesterday the day was overcast and colder. Last night we had a family dinner and Etta was as cute as ever. Wednesday night next week, minus mum, we'll have a pizza night for my second going away do. Mum goes to Kuala Lumpur this Saturday for a week so she won't be here to say bye to me but I'll see her this afternoon and tomorrow morning before she goes. I'm out with Sophie tonight, which I kind of feel guilty about regarding mum, but it's not as if we won't see each other again. We shall, only in Melbourne! I am really looking forward to getting on with things and starting my life. Enough of this limbo. I'm over it. I really hope Emma moves with me so we can get our own cute house and I can eat healthily and exercise regularly. Ooh I hope. There is so much volunteering to do and Uni to do. I'm excited to get started. I could go and take Katie for a walk but I can't really be bothered and mum hasn't specified for me to or not. I will tomorrow for sure and Sunday and Monday and Tuesday and Wednesday but dad will have to Thursday and Friday as he'll be here alone. Even though there is heaps of time before I have to leave to go to Medicare then to Sophie's for 5pm I feel pressured by the possibility of walking Katie. I should do mum that favour. Hmm. More episodes for now though.

January 2011

January has been a fine month. Nothing spectacular. This month I struggled with the two options of Sydney and Melbourne and by the end of the month, Melbourne won. Some lovely things have happened, like Jan and Fra coming out, finishing working at thebeach, and Etta starting to use her voice more but then the whole Sydney trip was a bit of a waste although I did need to go so I wouldn't regret not trying. I thought I had to go sooner rather than later to get settled and all of that but as it turns out, I don't want to do it all alone and Melbourne isn't looking as bad now I've let go of Sydney. It'll be much more fun, that's for sure.

In January I --

+ Saw Kyü at Mona Foma;

+ Spent Australia day with Kirsten and her two friends;

+ Made a list of things I want in my life -- house, career, to move states, travel and live in the UK;

+ Gained weight;

+ Figured out what my first tattoo will be but bolted when I realised it would be $90. It's too much money at the moment but if it's cheaper it might be nastier. It's something for Melbourne I think;

+ Met my lovely Welsh friend Sarah at the backpacker's whilst in Sydney. I now have someone to visit when I go over to the UK; and

+ Attended the Fronting MONA unit and went out to MONA for 4 days.

For February, I am going to relax more and not rush into heading to Melbourne. I have to finish my essay for Fronting MONA and I can start studying for my diploma. I think it will be a quiet month.

Australia Day

Not much to report other than I really want a baby. Hehe. I had Etta on my lap for a while and I had a nice hold of her. I totally want my own but I will have to wait for 1. a man and 2. a few years. Drat that. I just want to keep cuddling her all day!

Packing is getting better. Got to pack another bag which will get send/brought up later once I'm settled full of things like books and DVDs. I do want them straight away but I won't be using them and it won't be practical so later is fine, better in fact. I want to get a house asap if it's right but I also need a job asap. I'll look and apply for houses and go on a job hunt too. Hopefully Saturday will be the day for paper job/house hunting. I'll have to get up early. I'm making a list of houses to see and they are from 1030 onwards. I might have to get a cab from one to another.

So, when I get to Sydney, Saturday morning I can get the paper, look at houses, look at jobs, go around with my resume, and hope I get a job asap. I don't mind stay in the backpackers if I have a job and am waiting to get a house. I'm trying to change my Deakin enrollment to the Certificate but I'm struggling with the website. Once that's done I can apply for Centrelink. I've just realised that I can't complete the certificate in 6 months as there are 3 compulsory units to do and one is only available in the second semester! Drat it. Hopefully I hear back from Sydney and if not I will apply again with my updated details. I didn't mention the Maritime as work or Fronting MONA. That would have made a difference if I don't get an offer. Bugger. I guess I'll have to stick with the Diploma at Deakin. I'll wait until I find out from Sydney then apply again possibly. Drat again.

I said I'd go into work today and get my pay slips but I might do that another time. It's so long to get there and back just for that. I also need to do more packing. Tomorrow Jan and Fra and I will have some lunch in Sandy Bay, then I'll meet up with Andi, then with Emma and Holly for Onba and Cool Thai. Friday I could stop by work on the way to G and Etta's before the airport. It's funny feeling my time in Hobart running out, that I won't be here to do things anymore. I'm not sure the Co-op will be open so I might not be able to sell my books. Hmm drat. It wouldn't have been possible anyway since I'm leaving before they allow books to be sold for that semester. I might be too early.

Anyway, I should scan more important documents for rental applications. And pack more. And pack other things to be sent/brought up later.

Last day at thebeach!

No more work for me until Sydney! I did my last shift at thebeach today. It was nothing special. I'll have some drinks there on Tuesday night with people from work. I have some ciders as a mini present. So glad to be done. I'll be back [not to work but to visit]. Afterwards I went to visit James and George and Etta with mum, Jan and Fra. Etta is so cute!!! I go so mushy. She had a play in her Jolly Jumper and had a sit on my lap. I love holding her. Sometimes she cries a bit or gets bored and I'm sad when that happens. I'm shy around babies and don't know what to do with them really. I'm getting better as I've been exposed a lot to Etta, which I love, and it'll only get better. I've had experience with my bestie Andi's baby Ivy. I hadn't seen her for a while until one night last week and we had a cuddle. It was the best ever! Ivy is a beautiful girl. Just over 2 years old since August. What a cutie. I miss that one. Right now I'm going to have some food as I missed lunch due to working. I need a feed!

A short hello

I was so tired last night after not getting enough sleep the night before. I went to bed at 930pm after watching a bit of A Walk to Remember again to wind down. Jan and Fra finally arrived yesterday so we had a bbq dinner with James and George and Etta as well as me and mum and dad [Sarah had to work] and it was really nice. Didn't get much time with Etta as she was a bit upset not too long after I started holding her. I think other faces spooked her. I love that adorable girl though. So gorgeous. I can't wait to see what she looks like a little older.

Today was the second last day out at MONA. The morning was interesting with lots of talks about the artwork, the history of the artworks, and other valuable information. One of the talks was from the librarian there and it was amazing the kind of stuff she new about. Mum thought I should be a librarian because I'm quiet and I liked books as a kid but I would only do it if it were in an ancient library. Mary, the librarian at MONA, knew so much about ancient artefacts and I'd love to know what she knows. It got me considering being one if I could do it like she did. Maybe there's a special course. I have no idea.

Stuff with Sydney is still on hold. Still waiting for the 19th to roll around to find out if I'm going to be studying there or not. I talked to mum and whether or not I should hang around for another week or something if I don't get accepted and she said I should just go then anyway. I agree. I kinda always knew that I would. I want to start my new life as soon as possible!

For right now, I have to go and get ready for dinner at Mures with the family and Jan and Fra. Heading to my sister Sarah's first to car pool. I think I'll wear my new skirt, the grey one mum made.

Etta love

This is my favourite picture of my brother James and his daughter Etta.

I love how her hand is on his and how they're both looking at the camera.

Their eyes are different but lovely shades and you can tell they love each other.

My heart has grown so much with love for this little cutie.

I love that people say she and I look alike. It's such a great compliment.

I can't wait until she grows up a bit more, starts talking or at least understanding what you're talking about.

I can't wait to know what her personality is like and I can't wait until she recognises me for sure.

I love this little girl.

Christmas Day post #2

What a lovely Christmas! Once James and George and Etta arrived, J+G had a quick croissants and scrambled eggs with salmon breakfast, then once we were all in the same room we did presents! I got some lovely ones and have 2 manga's on the way [Mushishi], which I am very excited about. Just as we were on the home stretch opening the presents our extended family started arriving. It was nice. It felt weird because once again we're all older and I truly feel like one of the adults. I am determined though that next year I'll slim down and finally get fit. Next year is the year, no excuses. And Lyn and I were talking about getting ready for things before they even happen, like she does with teaching and her lessons, and I am going to make lists, again, of things that I really need to get into order before it's all upon me. I need to think about what needs to happen once I can book my flights. It'll get sorted. Mum and I and possibly dad are going to watch the Miss Potter movie on the TV tonight. Mum and I are looking forward to it. We've both never seen it. It'll be a nice relaxing night I believe.

My new white dress

It's the staff Christmas party tonight. I think it should be pretty fun. It won't be a huge night for me as I have Uni tomorrow at 10am and I have been lacking in sleep for the past week. I wonder what my present will be! I hope I like it. I'm wearing one of my new Myer dresses tonight and I feel pretty. Princess-soft-colours pretty. The dress is white and twirling makes it fly up nicely. I'm wearing a peach/pink coloured top, one of those ones that isn't a full-length top, and I feel pretty. Got to do something with my eyes. My eyeliner isn't sharp enough but I can fix that, and when I close my eyes, the top lashes go blonde towards me eyes. It's so weird and quite annoying when trying to put a line at the top of my eye. I might try using mascara. Sarah did my eyes nice when I went to her birthday party in November. I'll try to recreate that look.

Tomorrow I have Uni and my first assignment due for the semester. I need to find out where to get the cover sheets and where on earth to put the assignment once it's all printed out and stuff. I have no idea because I haven't gone to a class in the Art School before. Someone will tell me. In the break I'm meeting Andi. She called me up this afternoon and put on Ivy for a moment. Apparently she's getting better at talking on the phone. I miss that little girl.

The Opossum bay trip was a success. It was sunny, then it spat for a bit, but the sun always came back out. Didn't go for a swim but Sarah and I went for a walk along the beach, then had some lunch, then went back for a walk again but this time to pick up all the rubbish that was left on the beach. Lots of cigarette butts and things like straws and "Up and Go" drink boxes and bottle lids. It was disgusting. People are disgusting. Respect Mother Nature! I got to hold Etta for a bit. I went with James to get her from the place Megan and Joe are renting and held one of her hands as we walked back. Then George gave her to me while she went somewhere and had a lovely hold. She got a bit upset for some unknown reason [from G] but might have needed another nap. She is so cute. I love having her hand wrapped around my finger. It's a beautiful thing.

Back in Tasmania

I am so very glad to be back. This morning wasn't a very fun trip back though. First I had to get up at 6am. Not completely unpleasant but tiring. Then I misplaced my return Sky Bus ticket so once I got to the station I had to buy another. Luckily I got on the Sky Bus that was already there. I didn't want to be late. When I got to the airport I almost had to pay another $80 because my stuff was too heavy and I had an extra bag with my goodies in it. The lady at the desk was really nice though so she said to stuff it all into the one bag and hope that I didn't get my bag weighed or I'd have to pay the money. That was so nice of her. When she mentioned the $80 so many things were racing through my head for 20 full seconds she must have felt bad for me. Then on the plane people kept slightly bumping into me. Melbourne is not for me. I don't like it! Fate was telling me I'm meant to be in Sydney, and I think my horoscope agrees.

Horoscope -- To Be Blogged because I'm far, far away from my phone

I've been chilling most of the day since I got home. Sarah and I did a rush shopping trip to pick up some lay-bys after she got me from the airport at 925am then I got home and had some food immediately as I hadn't eaten all day. Then I did some homework [almost finished my cover letter for the first assignment for Fronting MONA. So proud] and watched Gilmore Girls. I have to work at 630pm, which is a bit annoying, but tomorrow Sarah and I are off to Opossum Bay to visit J and G and E. Then I might have work on Saturday evening and definitely have work Sunday-day, which I'm not too jazzed about, but it means I get work over and done with. We have the staff party that evening so that will be fun. Not a big one for me though as I have Uni the next day. I'm kinda glad work won't be so busy for me, although the money will suck. Hopefully I hear back about more volunteering.

I'm tired. And I feel weird. I'm not liking today and I'm not liking Melbourne. I'll have a late one tonight too so getting enough sleep before tomorrow won't be good. I'll have to get up at 830-9am to make sure I have enough time to shower and eat something. Drat it all. I'm getting tired again. Sarah gave me a V as soon as I got in the car and it worked but now it has worn off, at least I think it has. I never know if it's working or not. I just like how it tastes. I can never tell with it, or Red Bull.

I might go back to bed and watch more Gilmore Girls before it's time to head off to work.

Back online

I love my niece Etta so much, she makes me want to have a baby now. James and George and Etta came over for dinner tonight with mum's friend Christine from Launceston and it was so lovely seeing a happy, awake, and alert Etta. She's getting more and more like that. She's 4 months old! How time has flown by. I can't wait to start a family.

Speaking about starting things, I started a Spring/Summer unit at the Centre for Arts, aka Art School or Fine Arts part of the Uni, and it's to do with MONA, a new private museum [to be the largest in Australia] started by David Walsh. We have 6 weeks of 1h lectures and 1h tutorials then in January we go to the MONA [Museum of Old and New Art] site out at Moorilla for 5 days from 930-330 and do some intensive learning. It'll be fantastic! I'm loving being back at Uni even though the studying hasn't quite started yet. I won't be hugely bored this Summer! I'm pleased about that. And it's extremely relevant to my future studies. There is a chance of employment through this course but it's to be someone who mediates between the art and the viewer. It's not curating or anywhere near it but it'll be great to see that side of things and it might be a necessary stepping stone to one day being a curator or assistant curator. I'm very, very excited about it.

I'm going to get another Threadless tee! And as I told Holly when I saw her last week, I keep thinking of things in terms of tattoo's so this is a possibility. I think this addition to my collection makes 17 as I bought two the other day. I'm not sure why the name doesn't have a capitol and from my position it doesn't say anything about the design [art should speak for itself though and it does. Rona and I discussed this today at the Maritime] but it's not about the title it's about the beautiful work itself. And I truly love it.

sol

As I mentioned above, I went to the Maritime today. I felt like I was really doing something important. I was helping with a quest to find any evidence [through Hobart Regatta silk winning lists] that a particular carved whale bone and the family involved is linked to Tasmania. It is the hopes of the people asking for it to be brought to the Maritime and put on display, otherwise it'll stay in the USA, where is currently resides. I'll be continuing on with that next week! I'm pleased.

I have to pay my car rego tomorrow. I'm sad. I don't want to part with any more of the money I've been saving. Luckily I get paid tomorrow and this week I'm doing 5 shifts so it won't seem like too much has gone. It does make me sad watching it going down. It is, fingers crossed, the last time I'll have to do it for a few years and I'll, also fingers crossed, get some of this "investment" back once I sell it before heading off to Sydney or Melbourne.

For now it's off the computer and to bed! Some Gilmore Girls before sleep is inevitable and hopefully I won't wake up too early with the sun in the morning so I can feel rested instead of tired. That would be nice.

Time to rest

I have had a work-filled weekend and am really glad it's a rest day today. There's the possibility of work tonight but I hope I'm not needed as James and George and Etta and Sarah are over for dinner tonight and it's been a while since my birthday hugs with Etta. I'm working Tuesday, all day Friday, Saturday and Sunday anyway so that will be enough. I need to restore my energy, especially since I've been working at Relish lately.

Last night I grabbed hold of my brainwave about looking on the website I applied to Sydney because waiting for an email isn't right. I haven't received any offers yet but it might be a good idea to call up and ask someone about when I would hear back. I'm really excited. I can't wait to finally find out if I'm in. I wish this with all my heart. The Melbourne course is just not good enough so I'm extra wishing for Sydney. Please, oh, please let me get in.

Sydney is seriously all I think about these days. It's great to have something so wonderful to look forward to. I can't wait for change next year, wherever I end up. I think I might plan for an end-of-year holiday for myself. Emma and I did mention going to Thailand and Vietnam and other nearby countries so we might have to make that a definite! A few months would be fantastic. One day I'll get to Tibet and Peru and Nepal and China and Japan and Korea and Singapore and Malaysia and Indonesia and Bali and Hawaii and the list goes on! I want to do a lot of travelling.

I can't wait to some of my museum/archaeology books arrive in the mail. I also can't wait until Wednesday when I get to order some more. I am also excited about getting to put money into my bank. I don't want to spend too much on things so I have enough money to support myself while trying to find a job in Sydney. Centrelink will help me.

I love living over in the shed. It's my own space and it's much bigger and it just feels refreshing and right. I love watching shows late at night with the volume at a normal level. I would always have it at a lower level when living in the main house. I like having all of my stuff around me too. It's a good living situation. I can't wait until next year and having my own house. It'll be fantastic! A little bare at first but that's alright. It'll be my own home and it'll be all my own doing. I can't wait!

Museum studies is right for me

I am tired but I want to write. Mum and I went to visit the curator at the Maritime Museum today, Rona, and it was great talking to her. I realised fairly soon into the tour that this is the job for me. It's what I want to do and although the coursework and what I end up doing might be a little different I am fairly certain of this. I am looking forward to my trip to Sydney to find out more and to start planning for next year. I have also started thinking about art history and doing the graduate certificates in art curatorship. This would be extremely relevant to museum studies, with some units overlapping, and as some of the units I am interested in are in different semesters I might take a year to do the 6 months course [4 units] and work and settle into Sydney. Otherwise I might just start straight away with museum studies, the diploma, as the certificate isn't a prerequisite for the diploma. I'll find all this out when I go to the Open Day. That's just about all I wanted to say.

James, George and Etta came over tonight for dinner in partial celebration for my recent graduation. I snapped a few photos on my phone of my sister and Etta and me and Etta [taken by Sarah] and I think they're pretty great. I have gotten a few phone applications to do with cameras and these photos were taken as Polaroids so I will post them now. I think they are great. I need to do more experimenting in the daytime to compare all of the different types of cameras I now have thanks for the applications. I love my new phone.

Sarah and Etta.

Me and Etta.

James, George and Etta were over yesterday at my parent's house [where I am currently living] for lunch. I had long holds/cuddles with Etta and it got me thinking about how much I want what they have but also that I'm scared because I know nothing about babies. They keep mentioning all these little things about baby stuff that I have never heard of before and on our walk, mum said I would find out when it was necessary. I hope so. I can't wait to have that life. I know I don't want to settle down in Tassie though. I want to live in the UK. I reckon I'll come back here for a while but it's not my idea place to settle down. The only thing keeping me here is friends and family. I have plans for Sydney and the UK before and after that [after for a longer time] but I'll miss Etta growing up and them having a second child. "Drat that Mrs. Kim" [Gilmore Girls].

Yorick was in my dream last night. My sister and I were sitting in a classroom I used to be in for a class in high school, one of the terrapins off the English building that I had German in, and Yorick was there behind us somewhere trying to suss out what we were doing in the class. I haven't seen him in weeks and the only contact we've had was about tax numbers. He hasn't contacted me and I haven't contacted him. I'm happy with the way things are and I don't care that we're not seeing each other. The only reason I think it's weird that we're not together is because for the last 4 years I was sure we were meant to go the distance. I'm happy not hanging out with him but I want gossip and Sophie is away so she can't find it out for me and pass it on. I don't really want to hang with him but then I like to so I know what he's up to. That's not a good reason to ask him to hang. We said we might go for hot chips in Lenah Valley for the next hang session. I might ask him to do that when I need him to fix my computer as he said he would. I want him to be jealous of all my plans, Sydney, UK and the Federal Group. I like having gossip from Sophie. I'm seeing Holly this afternoon so maybe she has some gossip for me.

I told Alison about the possibility of Coles Bay and she was excited for me. I thought she'd be mad because I'll be leaving thebeach when they need good workers. She has hired 4 new people but I'm not sure they're very experienced. I might not even get the job but I'm hoping I do. I need the change of scenery and the adventure and the full-time work. I might get the news just after my graduation on the 21st of August. If I don't get it I'll have to find full-time work elsewhere. I'm excited about seeing Holly today. I've missed her and I have so much to tell her. She's definitely like a big sister. When I contacted her last week about meeting up sometime [she said today] she said she wondered where I had gotten to as I said I was sick. She didn't write to me though. Sad.

Dad and I are going to go for a walk soon. I got my new runners from Big W for $14 and the are fine, not sore at all after my walk with mum yesterday. I want to get back into exercise mode. I want to lose weight and get fit. Going to Coles Bay would be great as I could run on the beach each day. That would be bliss.

Guilt for another reason

I have to tell my boss Alison that I have applied for the Freycinet/Cradle Mountain job and that I have put her down as a referee. Mum says I don't owe her any kind of explanation but I feel I should. I feel like I'm leaving her in the lurch but then again as mum pointed out I'm not working there much and the job I applied for is full time work in a great location. I want to say to Alison that I need this kind of adventure and I want to explain because that's just who I am so I think I will. I have drafted a message and tried to soften the blow by saying it would only be for a few months but I shouldn't lie. If I got the job and I liked it I wouldn't go back to thebeach as there would be no time and I'd only come back for social visits. She has some great workers there, even though a lot have left recently and more are planning to, and more coming in this week. They'll survive. I just feel bad, especially since Sara said she and Alison had been talking about how functions should have the same staff and that I could be one of those staff. It's just to keep things consistent but it is kind of like more power or that I'm slightly moving up in the hierarchy despite having worked there for almost 2 years. I feel like I owe her an explanation. I feel guilty. I don't want to feel guilty.

In other news, I sent my resume and cover letter to a friend of the family to give to his contact at the Tasmanian Museum and Art Gallery [TMAG] to see about me being shown around the museum to find out what being a curator means. I might volunteer there for a week to get to know the ins and outs of the job. Another friend of the family also has a contact at the museum across the road, one we haven't been to, and I might be able to do a similar thing there. It would be a great way to start on this career path and to make sure it's what I want to do for my career. I think it's just the right combination of archaeology, anthropology and history in the form of a focused, categorical, and organised job which will be just perfect for me. I am so excited about Sydney.

I am going to head off now and buy some running shoes and maybe something to wear to the gym and while I'm out walking. Maybe some shorts and knee length leggings to wear underneath. I don't want to show my figure as I don't like it very much and I want to feel comfortable enough to workout in front of people. Then tomorrow I can go for a walk in my new gear before heading out to hang with Andi and visit James and George and Etta. I did a bit of skipping today, for 3 minutes at the most, and I'm not very springy. I wobble too much and feel very heavy. I need to work on that. Tomorrow I'll kick myself into gear. Another thing I love about the possibility of this job is that I'll be in a great routine, I can go running on the beach each morning before work, and focus on myself. I hope I get it.

Freycinet or Cradle Mountain?

I'm currently applying for a position with the "Federal Group" in Tasmania. There are positions at the Freycinet Lodge and Freycinet Saffire, and the Cradle Mountain Chateau that I'm interested in and it's a position that I would move away from home work, to live wherever I get a position and work full-time to save as much money as I can for the UK and beyond. I'm still working on the application but it's already so exciting.

I went to James and Georgie's for a visit today with mum and we met Nanna and Pa there also, the great-grandparents to Etta Joy O'Regan. She's such a beautiful and well-tempered baby. Simply gorgeous. I can't wait for my own to really know what having a baby is like. I have visited her 4 times now. I like holding her. Her cheeks are less puffy. Aww. After that we went to lunch at my work. Mum and I shared the "special" pizza, the pizza from the specials board, and it was so nice. Pesto with chicken, ricotta, avocado and red onion. So delicious and filling. I'm back there tonight to work. It'll be good to get some money coming in and to do something with my time. I have to tell Alison I'm applying for this job and say that the might call her as she is one of my referees. I hope I get this job. I think it'll be great. Only time will tell. The applications don't close for a few weeks but that's okay. I shall wait.

Baby Etta

My brother and his wife had their first child yesterday at 419am. I can't believe it. It's still so surreal but they are going to be fantastic parents and already are. James is so cute towards their little girl, Etta Joy O'Regan. He calls her 'kiddo' and I love seeing him like that. He has a daughter. It's so insane. I can't comprehend it. I love that they have a family though. I'm jealous. I want my own little family. I have to find my future husband first though, then settle down and have kids and a great house with French doors and balconies. I also need to get my Masters in Museum Studies and become a Museum Curator. I wonder how that will all go. I've been sick for a week now and it's not so fun. I will head to bed soon and watch lots of TV then try to get an early night. I'm bad with my sleeping patterns. I go to my bedroom and watch lots of episodes of a TV series then end up turning it off by 1am. I need to go to bed earlier. It's hard though. Going to be used to be fun as I had Yorick next to me but not anymore. I don't want him as such, just my future husband to spend my life with. I miss the company sometimes but not hugely. I'm doing fine.